Decomonster Does Dallas

The joining

2008-03-30T00:26:00.000-07:00

THE JOINING
This year has been so tiring, but full of joy. Shaune and I joined a new church. It was difficult to leave a church like Crossroads, when the people you love there are family. Sometimes, I feel as though I let a lot of people down by leaving. Many people were angry and felt betrayed to hear that we were no longer members, even though we told them that it was God's calling to this church. But you know what I realized... no one really misses us. No one from crossroads ever calls us, not even just to catch up. But than again, I have not called either. People come and people go. They are only in our lives for a fleeting moment.
It is a small church, and month by month we are growing. We were presented to the church before Easter, and there was cheering galore. I must say that I blushed when a 70 year old woman hugs me and shakes the hand of me and my husband and tells me, "Im sure you will be teaching us more than we will be teaching you." That made me feel so funny standing up there are hearing that. God uses all things for a purpose and even the smallest of person such as an infant can be used to teach people new things. This church has taught me many things. One is to listen more closely to God. When I first stepped into the church, I knew God was calling me to start a children's ministry. But me, being human and foolish said to God, "Not now, I am resting. I am tired and need to be at peace with myself for just a while." But God came knocking again and I said, "God I have so much to do! I am running a summer camp, picking staff members, going to school! I don't have the time." Then Passover comes around and I kneel before the alter and ask God what he wants of me. He made it clear so many times before. This time he says, "Don't you trust me to lead you along the path? I know the plans I have for you. Believe in me and through you I will accomplish much." So, now I start my long/short walk down the path of being in charge of teaching children about Christ. I'm here for however long God needs me. It is not by my hands that I do this, but by Gods. I feel foolish and stupid that I waited and ignored him so long, but somehow, he must have know I would have done it. Again, I love being a donkey. This little church has taught me, that if there is one thing I need to believe in, it is Christ. The church is ready for me, God is read for me. Sooooo... where the heck an I? I cannot hid from God, so why is it that I find myself hiding now? I am listening God, and I am ready for whatever it is you want me to do. Director of Children's Ministries, God is telling me, I am finally ready.

Just when I thought it wouldn't get any funnier...

2008-01-28T22:46:00.000-08:00

So yesterday I was very much at peace with myself. Student observations are going great and I'm floating down our long hallway toward my Kindergarten classroom when I See a poster for the Community Education Monopoly tournament. I have done this every year we have had it, and I am always a banker. My summer boss did not call me and tell me about it, which was strange for her. She normally does. Well, I called her this afternoon and told her I would volunteer again this year and was looking forward to doing it again. We started talking about Summer's Cool, the program I have worked for the last three years. We talked about the fun things to come, and she offers me the job writing the curriculum for the program. I was floored and excited and took the offer. My resume was about to be beefed up with two curriculum books under my belt, when she asked if I was going to come back this year as a Site Supervisor. I told her I would like to, and that I was not doing school during the summer. Then she casually asked if I would like to have a Director position for the camp. NO WAY!!!!! This is so cool! Something even better to add to my resume! Director of a school camp... responsible for 60 kids and 12 staff members, including 2 Site Supervisors. I must say that I love that y boos has faith in me and my ability to manage and teach children. I accepted of course. I would rather work a 40 hour work week than 30 and get paid almost double of what I was making last year.

First, I must say this came as a shock. Second, this is also a gift from God. The definition of gift can be use many ways. I like to think of gifts as blessings from God that I do not deserve. A struggle that I have is money. My school, and Shaune's Master Degree are burning a nice little hole in our pocket book. It is easier to worry than it is to trust. Money always fall from the sky when we Shaune has needed it most. Shaune has a strong faith that God will always provide when we need it. What I love about God is how he shows you in small ways that you are being ridiculous. When I start to worry about finances, God drops money into Shaune's lap. Whether it is a rel estate job, a dividend check, or some life insurance account that he closed years ago and is paying him out. Whenever I worry where the money will come from, God dangles the $ bills above my head and says "My child, why do you not trust in me to take care of you?" Then, as always, I feel like a complete ass for not trusting in him. I love those little moments when I feel like a donkey. I was starting to worry where the money for my last semester would come from, because coming back t camp as a Site Supervisor would not have paid for it. This job however, will be able to cover my tuition, my books, my 1/2 semester parking sticker, and my graduation robes, invitations and Thankyou cards. Isn't God good?!

Life can be funny...ha, ha

2008-01-28T00:17:00.000-08:00

Less than a year before I graduate from college. Most people who go to school as long as I have, have the title Dr. before their first name. I am in the student observation phase and will be student teaching in August. I am going to Hawaii, Germany, or Australia for a two week vacation. After eight years, I will definitely need some R&R.

So life can be funny...ha,ha. Some times God can intervene in your life when you least expect it. It happens when someone becomes content with their current situation in life. Our church lost its pastor two years ago... then we got a new one. It was a traumatic time for people in the church and some people left. There were different reasons why people left. Some did not want to get involved in all the drama, some were extremely heart broken by what happened, others did not feel compelled to stay,etc... But God can do all things through our lives. Shaune and I had planned on staying at Crossroads long until we were good and dead. God had other plans for us though. Shaune best friend Bryce Eubanks got married in a small church which has about 58 members. That is a SMALL church! Shaune and I met the pastor and decided to visit based upon an invitation to come to church with the Eubanks clan. All this happen in May... and Shaune and I have not been back to Crossroads yet. At first, I had some problems with the small church, I was not used to it and the music is mostly Hymns. For some strange reason, we feel drawn to the little church. No one noticed that we had left Crossroad and had not gone to church in a while. It was around VBS time when people started realizing they did not see me around the church. People started calling Shaune and I and the first thing people asked was did we join another church. The answer was always no, and people started to tell us that we had to come back. We had people upset at us and call us heathens because they thought we had deserted our church.

“I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)”

God did exactly that with Shaune and I. We knew God wanted us to stay at this small church. Many of the members are just learning to read the bible within the last 5 years. Many of them have never understood the true word of God. At first I was afraid and wanted to go back to Crossroads...but now I am not so afraid anymore. God has made it clear that he has a plan to use Shaune I here. Shaune had been leading Wed. night bible study for a small groups of 10-12 people who regularly come. He has been asked to teach Sunday school as well. Shaune always knew he wanted to teach, but he thought he would do it in his later 40s. I helped out at there VBS over the summer. Its a big change going from a program of 900 kids down to 25. :) W have been praying for guidance for a while and we finally got it about a week ago. It is painful, but yet exciting. Shanda and I are going to become members at our new church and help it grow. People have been hinting for me to become the Director of Children's ministries there. We had a board meeting today where the church elected members to the board. When they got to the Director of CE, our speaker said the position was open and they have been praying for someone to take the spot. On a side note, I hate it when people talk about you in front of you! It is embarrassing, especially when people are taking about the good things you have done and will do in the future. I hate it when people do that. The body was whispering my name. Every table had my name on their lips, talking amongst themselves saying that I was talented and I should be the one to do it. Something only Shaune, Pastor Bruce and his wife Robyn know, is that I felt called to do it the first moment that I stepped inside the church doors. It was something I had been praying about and had only told those people because it was near and dear to my heart. Well, one thing, lead to another, and God made his presence know and laid His hands on me, and you are looking at the soon to be member of the FMCC church, as well as the soon to be Elder of Christian Education. ( I don't like this title for several reasons. 1st and foremost I think I am too young to be an elder in a church. I feel I need to be an older wiser woman. I prefer to call it Director of Children's Ministries instead. I gets to the point quicker, and tells what I do. So this is God's plan. Lord, I sure hope you know what you are doing. I feel so young, even though I am 26 years old.

God has a plan... I am quitting work. This school homework load does not fit in with my work schedule, so we had decided to have me concentrate on homework here at the house. Isn't it funny that after we decide this, the CE thing become more clearer? Now I have more time to write curriculum for the summer and next year. I will be setting up the ENTIRE program from scratch. Toddler, youth, middle and high school groups. God give me strength and do your work through me. Thank you for chosing me to be the vessel for this. More to come later, have to wake up in 4 hours formy 12 hour work day. Will leave work sometime half way through February. Right now I am pulling 12 hour days workingand going to school at Camey elementary school in the Colony and taking 12 hours at UNT. 2 on Monday 2 on Tuesday. Needless to say,I am excited to have more time to write in my blog in a couple of weeks.

Oh, and P.S. I will still be doing bible studies at CBC to ensure my spiritual growth and knowledge. More to come later...

Husband Graduating

2007-11-03T22:39:00.000-07:00

My husband graduates from DBU with an MBA in Buisness Managment on December 14th. I am so proud of him! My birthday was on November 1st. We had lots of fun. It was one of three birthdays in my life time where friends have wanted to take me out to dinner and celebrate with me. I have not celebrated my birthday with a group of friends since my junior year of highschool when my friend Scott Anderson threw me a suprise birthday party. This made me realize how important friends are in a persons life. I have not had many friends in my life, but a few have been there for me when I needed them and they are true friend. Thanks to all of you who have always been there for me. May God watch over you always.

Long Time Gone . . .

2007-10-20T01:26:00.000-07:00

So, I finally got a chance to blogg... which I have not done in forever. But now that the bulk of my classes are out of the way, I am finding the time. Shaune and I have been going to FMCC. Flower Mound Congregational Church. It was so sudden when it happened. We are not members, but we have been attending a bible study on Wednesday nights. Shaune and I decided to visit the church after Bryce and Kelly were married. We visited and we never left. It is very different from Crossroads; the only difference is that we have known that this is where we are supposed to be for now. It was so strange. We were not looking for a church and here we end up. God has told us that we need to be here for the time being. I have been doing bible studies at crossroads because out little church only has 40 members, and it is still growing. Crossroads will always be our home church, but this is where God has called us to be for now.

I am talking 4 classes this fall and I graduate next December. Shaune and I are in the processes for looking for a house. I am trying to go and visit Robyn in March for spring break. I am a Site Supervisor in the ESD program for Castle Hills Elementary school, and Shaune and I are celebrating our 3rd year of marriage in April. We will start trying to have children in a year, and my grandmother on my mom’s side is having shoulder replacement surgery. WOW! That is a lot. There is so much more going on, but that will have to wait another time. God is good right now.. and that is all I have to say

P.S. I have skype if anyone out there has it and wants to talk through it.

SOmething WOW!!! and different . . .

2007-06-09T12:50:00.000-07:00

More to come at a later date. . . Will clarify the situation about the other church at a later date . . . possibly at a the end of the summer is when we will make our final choice.

I am now posting again!!!

2007-05-30T09:17:00.000-07:00

HA! HA! This semester is finally over! WOO HOO! I made 4 A's and a B. Sweet bliss. I am currently training te LISD's new Summer's Cool staff with my team members. This summer will be lots of fun. I was given a good staff. I am very greatful to God for that. This summer I wil be taking one University class each month while I am working. I don't think that it will be too bad, but we'll just have to see. The summer camp curriculum that I wrote turned out wonderful. Everyone loves it and they have expressed an interest in me writting mext years curriculum. God has blessed me with so many wonderful opportunities. I have decided to brush up on my guitar playing this summer. I laugh at this because I broke my aucustic guitar a year or two ago. It was not a good one by any means, and the bridge just decided to pop off one day. So I am currently using a guitar that I have never played on before. SHaune recieved it as a gift YEARS ago, but it is a slammin guitar for it kind. I am playing an electric guitar. :) Who would have though. I will have to buy another classical or accoustic guitar when the time comes later on.

Two weeks ago Shaune lifetime best friend go married to an awsome woman. I am really happy for the both of them. They make a famtastic couple. One of the best memories that I have about Bryce is this. . . We were joking around about the wedding and how stressful planning a wedding can. I jokingly told him that they sould elope an blow all the money and time they had put into the wedding already. Byce, very seriously, said nope. I have been waiting for this day for a while. I want to see her all dolled up and walking down the isle in her wedding dress. Iw ouldn't miss that moment for the world.

When a man says such sweet things about the woman he loves: that is a true man.
Congrats two the two of them! I love you both!

More to come on the blogg, I promise. . .

P.S. sorry about the spelling.

Spring Break

2007-03-18T21:34:00.000-07:00

It is 11:34 p.m. Sunday night. An hour ago I finished the last of my midterm tests. So far so good. Still have A's in all five of my classes. I have to get a head start on a ton of papers due in April during my spring break. I have 20 4 pages and up papers due in April. I also have a book drive to participate in when I come off of spring break. My anxiety level is hitting the roof just about now. I am going to get two massages this week to help reduce my stress levels.

Shaune and I bought a new 07 Nissan Altima this week. We have been experiencing car trouble with the Mazda and we decided it was time and with his current rising in the home selling business, he needed a car to drive clients around. It is beautiful.

Shaune and I decided that when I graduate depending on money, we can do one of two things. I can celebrate my graduation by taking a trip for two to Hawaii, or flying solo back to German and spending some time there with friends and making new ones. I hope its the latter of the two, but I realize that Shaune and I will be needing some time together as well. It is hard living in the same house and not being able to see your husband. We make it work though. I look forward to seeing him late on Tuesday and Thursday nights after class, and getting to spend time together on the weekends. We spend our weekends up at his office. I work home homework and he works on projects he needs to finish. We work side by side. Just having his presence there is great.

Shaune got his tux for the Eubanks-Burr wedding coming up on May 12th. I am so excited! Will write more later! Love you all and miss you lots!

Long Time No Post

2007-02-05T23:21:00.000-08:00

Last time I posted was when I was in Germany. We got home ok. We nearly missed our plane. It was a good flight back, but much culture shock. I discovered that I have a lot of European in my personality. I miss Germany. If I wasn’t married I so could have moved over there. Thinking about it makes me sad. The countryside was great and so were the towns. Shaune and I made some friends there and one of them *Max* we three became very close. Shaune still laughs about the Cosby kids (inside joke). Hopefully we will be back in Germany with friends in a year or two.

My gosh! We came back on a Thursday night and Shaune and I both went back to work on Friday. The very next Friday, we married off my sister on January 13th. The wedding was done in black and white and it was BEAUTIFUL! I now have a brother-in-law who is almost 7 feet tall. Blake, you are so cool. I am glad because my sister married into a great and godly family. God is the center, which drives them all. I'll post pictures when we get them back.

The Monday after the wedding, we started school. School is REALLY kicking the tar out of me. I know I have said it before and have whined about school, but all the other semesters are nothing compared to this. I am taking 5 classes (15 hours) and am working three days a week. I and writing curriculum for a Summer camp, and have 50 hours of observation and volunteer service to do. I almost quit my job, which was making me very sad for a few weeks. I love my job and do not want to quit. I was blessed to have opportunities open up and my boss is working with me. Apparently, I am valuable to them and I am being given opportunities that not many people have been given the luxury of having. I am truly blessed. My days and night are now filled with TONS of homework. I am taking a break at 1:35 in the a.m. from doing homework to post this. I have 20 four to five page papers due in April. LITERALLY. This does not include the regular schoolwork, or online work, or service and observation hours that I have to complete. Blogging may be slow for this semester, but I want to try to keep up with it. I laugh at myself sometimes. So close to graduating, but yet so far away it seems.

We are going to look at buying a house again either this summer or in the winter. We finally were able to get the guy downstairs to turndown his TV. News on my grandfather: his prostate has enlarged. They did a test to see of he would be a candidate for radioactive seeds, but they can't do it because he has an enlarged prostate. A prostate should be the size of a walnut or a little smaller. His is the size of a tangerine or a small orange. Prayer is needed for this. My grandpa is 80 years old and the only option left is radiation. I don't think this is a good thing at all for his age. My family is worried.

Women's retreat decorating is going great! I am really excited with our theme this year and look forward to not being sick, or having my bathroom flood the suite downstairs. I have deepened some friendships as the retreat planning goes on. Will post more later!

Pictures

2007-01-01T02:54:00.000-08:00

These are pictures of us in the Swizz Alps and down and around Badenwilder Germany. The picture of the street is what Robyn sees out her bedroom window! Here the castle is lit up at night!

Germany Days 1-3

2006-12-27T03:21:00.000-08:00

On December 23rd at 7:50 a.m. we arrived in Zurich Switzerland. We drove from there to Robyn’s flat in Badenweiler, Germany. It is like living in Vail Colorado. It is so beautiful being tucked away in the mountains of the Black Forest. The town is closed down for three days for Christmas. In Germany, they celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve and summon people to church by ringing the large bells inside the bell tower. They go off at all times during the three days and they hold several mass services. When we came today we took a short nap and were invited to tea. Unfortunately we could not go to Robyn’s friends house because we had jet lag. (Just a tiny bit.) Later on during the day, *Max*, a friend of Robyn’s who is around our age came to meet. He made us WONDERFUL (I can’t say wonderful enough!) vegetable soup which was made Kosher because he is Jewish. *Max* is very cool and fun to hang out with. Robyn and *Max* bought a “Charlie Brown” Christmas tree and decorated it before we came. Because we had the tree we had to wrap gifts as soon as we got there. Robyn was VERY shocked when she realized how many presents were under the tree. She opened some Christmas cards from her family and friends as well as her food gifts. We were going to go to mass, but we ended up crashing early.

We woke up around 11:30 on Christmas Day and had chocolate filled scones (bread) for breakfast as well as German coffee. Starbucks has no idea how to make coffee after you have tried the coffee they have here. It is delicious. It took us about three hours to open gifts. Robyn said this was the most presents she had received in her entire life. It was a very emotional time for her and she cried a WHOLE LOT! This picture was of her face after she opened her large gift, which was a new laptop computer, sent from a very dear friend. We had her shut her eyes and pulled off the blanket that was covering it. She stamped her foot on the floor and screamed “OH MY GOSH!” This is very big because everything in Germany is quiet. There is even a “no running electrical appliances after 9:00 p.m. and between 12:00 p.m. and 2:30 p.m.” clause written in the apartment units in her town. This is how seriously Germans take their peace and quiet. Right after she opened the computer, her friend called and they chatted for a while and she cried some more. God is so amazing. She cannot believe how he has provided for her. God is so good. We milled around for the rest of the day and Shaune got to work setting up her new computer and transferring her files to it. This was perfect timing because she though Shaune was going to come and fix her old computer which only had 4 gigabytes of hard drive left on it. This new computer has over 100 gigabytes of RAM. So not only did God provide a new computer, but he send someone who could fix her old one and set up her brand new one. God has really made his presence known. Tomorrow we are going to Colmar, France. WOO HOO!

Today is *Max*’s birthday! He turned 22 today! For his birthday we went to Colmar France. We visited the Weihnachtmarkt which has little carts parked in a square and sell their wears. There were tons of Christmas item, and a lot of stuff that looked American. Well, at least I knew I could get it in America for a cheaper price! We ate at a French café that we were lucky enough to find open. What was strange about the experience is that all though there are tons of Christmas decorations around and everyone wishes each other Merry Christmas and goes to Church, so many people do not know God. Over half the people who come to mass on Christmas do not know Jesus and who he was. It is so unbelievable. But when Robyn translates, or you hear people talking it is very apparent that Christ is just another person to talk about. Movies like “Nativity” and “The Passion” are not big here because since religion is not big here, it is not a big deal when the movie comes out and there is nothing to argue about in the papers. After lunch, we drove back to Germany and into the Black Forest mountains. You know the post cards that show pine forests covered forest and every branch is dripping with ice? That is what the mountains looked like. It was so BEAUTIFUL! It was breath taking to think God has set this scene. We drove to a restaurant in the mountains glittering with ice and had black forest cake for desert. I did a lot of thinking in the mountains. After dinner we drove home and walked to Belvedere castle just up the street. At Christmas time they outline the castle in white lights. We walked up into the ruins and look out over the top of the castle you could look all the way into France from the top. The sky was black but the cities were lit up with lights and you could hear the church bells and make out the outline of all the church steeples. It was amazing. Switzerland, France and Germany are beautiful. Tomorrow we will be going to a Roman bathhouse with *Max*. He loves to swim. It is only 17 Euros to spend the day have a hot spring bath, sauna, and swimming. I am so excited! Shaune and *Max* have come fast friends and have a lot in common in mannerisms and dreams. Both are passionate about what they believe in. They are great conservationists. Will write more about Germany and the bathhouses tonight as well as publish pictures!

*Names have been changed to protect the innocent incase of a court of law*

5 Days and Counting

2006-12-17T21:19:00.000-08:00

Getting ready to go to Germany has been wow. I never though getting ready for Christmas and getting ready to go on vacation would be so tiring! It is a good tired though. In 6 days at this time I will be on an over night flight going to Zurich Switzerland. I have never been anywhere out of country for this length of time before. I am so excited. I will miss my family and friends and the together time that we send at Christmas. But I will be with another family member for Christmas. I am truly bessed that God is giving me this chance. God is so good. What can I say . . .

I plan on blogging while in Germany and posting pictures, so stay tuned!

Six days and counting . . .

Celebrate!

2006-11-19T22:02:00.000-08:00

Today I feel, happy, sad, joyous, relief, and excited. I have finally made it past my crunch week and have a week to myself. I have things I still have to get done during the week, but I can do then whenever I want. There is no set time for when I have to do homework, or when I have to lesson plan. I can do it when I want this week. I can also focus on other tings ahead of me such as getting ready to go to Germany! My family is so excited for me and my grandparents took it quite well. This will be the first time I have NEVER spent Christmas with my family. I will be in beautiful Germany with a beautiful friend and my husband. Maybe even skiing in the Alps. Who knows, I still have to go and buy an exploration book to see what there is to do! I am really looking forward to seeing what God has created behind these American walls. We live in such a free world with loads of privileges where we can see and speak about God freely with our friends. I have never been to a place where the majority of people do not know God, or where I do not speak their language. It is hard to fathom at times being in a sea of people where I am the only one of the few to know Christ. This excited me very much. For once, I get to be the stranger. I am excited to me different people and have a guide who can speak German. We will have to go different places and try out her translation skills! Ohhhh I am so excited to see what God has behind these walls. This country is all I have ever known and I LOVE to travel and long to see the world that God has created. 27 days and counting!

2006-11-11T23:04:00.000-08:00

I have decided that there are several distince "friend" gaps in your life.

1) When you get married and all your friends are still single. They never call you anymore, or you get married, waite three months, call your friends and they do not return your calls or want to peruse a relationship further than what it was.

2) When you move from being married to being married and having kids. There is a lifestyle change here. When you don't have kids it is hard to be around couples with kids because they treat you different. Or, it is hard to be couple friends because they are just at a different stage of life than you are and you stop hanging out with one another.

3) When you go from elementary school to middle school, or middle school to highschool, or highschool to college. Any of the friends that you have made that are in a different grade fade away because of the different times school starts and gets out, as well as it is not cool to hang with someone from a lower grade.

4) Moving to a different city and then moving back. If you do not keep in contact with your friends when you are not living in town, then when you move back the person may or may not assimilate you back into their life.

It seems hard to have close friends, especially when a person is not a phone person. I hate talking on the phone. I like going places with friends, e-mailing, or talking on the phone every couple of weeks. Small talk on the phone is ok, but I do not like long conversations. I just don't think much gets done when you are on the phone so long. There are friends, whom I consider friends, that I do not see anymore because of these life gaps. It seems when you lose touch for a little bit of time and you talk to someone that they do not have an interest in being close friends as it was before.

Don't get me wrong there is always the other side of the spectrum where the above is completely wrong. Sometimes life just seems so busy. It is always nice to have a couple of close girl friends. I think that why I love blogging so much. I know I don't type much sometimes, but I love being able so look online and see how my friends, and my old friends are doing. Life is always changing.

Birthdays and WEIRD thoughts

2006-11-08T22:37:00.000-08:00

Shaune and I celebrated his 28th birthday on October 18th and mine on November 1st. I am now 25 and it hit me that if I live to be 100 then I am already 1/4 of the way through my life. For some reason I have been thinking of this a lot lately. I know I have said, You're only as old as you feel." and "I will never grow old" ... but today I start wondering if I have used my 1/4 of my life to serve God as best as I could have. I mean, everyone can always be better at something, but sometimes being an imperfect being and always falling short can be SO tiring at times. When I look at what I wrote it sounds so funny, its like a mini midlife crisis. There are loads of things I could have done better. . .

1) Be a better daughter
2) a better wife
3) a better student
4) better house keeper
5) better listening
6) better at keeping my mouth shut
7) better at letting things go
8) better at spending my tome wisely
9) better servant
10)better friend
12)having more patience
13) better at being on time
14)better at not keeping track of my mistakes. . .

Sometimes I wonder at the things God will show me in heaven that I did not recognize here on earth. And then I remember not to think of things such as this. Worry about fruitless stuff like this will only keep me from the tasks at hand. Proverbs 11:28 says a life devoted to things is a dead life, a God shaped life is a flourishing tree. Romans 8:6 says Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open , into a spacious free life. Is there such a thing a being to God focused? Can you try to focus on God so much that you learn not to listen? Obviously that if the person is truly focused on God the right way your cup will never empty. If the person is worrying about being to focused on God the the problem lies within ones self, not with the focus on God. Does a mind ever rest? Does the body? Life seems to happen so fast that we keep wanting more. The more one task masters the more time one will have to do good. But what good will one do if one does not rest? Life is filled with double edge swords. The mind is a funny thing is it not? So many rabbit trails, so little time. Thinking of things that one could do better or thinking of all the sacrifices one has made for the good of another is not a wise thing to do. Being bitter is a human bodily emotion. It amazes me that the body can still feel this but the soul feels so differently knowing you have given up something to God. See Brit . . . Christians have problems with the mind too. We are not perfect beings. But you know what? I'm ok with that. People post your thoughs on my weird comments. What do you make of them?

Cool Things About Family

2006-10-21T08:18:00.000-07:00

It is a traditional Saturday morning her at the Corbett household. Shaune and I went to go watch the Southlake Carole Dragons play football last night. We left at halftime when the score was 31 to 7 in favor of the Dragons. I have had two BUSY weeks of nothing but non stop homework. I had 4 tests, 3 HUGE projects, and many late nights due this past week. Friday was such a relief. Saturday I get to spend cleaning the house up. But what was cool was waking up. Yep, this is me you are talking to. I have been dubbed the nickname bearcat because if you wake me before I am ready to get up, or if I did not ask you to get me up, I am moody. But today was cool. My dad called me on his cell phone from Seattle Washington where his whole family is. After I talked to my dad a while he passes the phone of to my uncle George. George is my dads twin brother. In pictures when they were children you couldn't tell who was who. George is very funny and loves to make people laugh. He is always fun to be around. He teased me about "The Early Bird Gets The Worm" because he and my dad wake up at 4 in the morning while I get up at 10. Everytime I talk to my uncle I remember all the fun things we have done together. We toured his base that he works on, had dinner at Anthony's where I ate muscles, camped in the mountains where the real bathroom was hidden and he tricked my dad into going to the bathroom in a God forsaken outhouse (THAT WAS HILARIOUS!), magic tricks, the pink pig who walks and scrunches his nose (they have a huge stuffed animal collection) which I am now the proud owner of one too, and my wedding which he came down here for. I love it when my dad and George get together.. They are so much fun to talk to. He also lived in Germany for nine years :) and was excited to see the blogg of A Mutating Missionary and all her wonderful pictures. Waking up with a smile on your face is so much fun. This morning has been so cool. I am so blessed to have such great family.

Reality Check . . .

2006-09-15T22:37:00.000-07:00

Its hard to face those moments when God lets you know just what your life is looking like at a certain moment in time. This week I realized how negative my emotions can be when I do not relieve stress from my body. Last week, after our return home from Hot Springs Arkansas, I got a massage on Wednesday. The woman was WONDERFUL!!! (massage envy in copell, ask for michelle) She could see how in pain my body was and as I was lying on the table we were talking. During this time I began thinking. After the massage I felt so relaxed . . . the most I have been in a LONG TIME. I felt relieved, happy, mellow, and not so negative. I started seeing how negative I can be when my soul and body are in pain. This coming week is going to be spent in time with God. There are those weeks when I just need to be held by my father and repair and recuperate from all of the worldly things around me. It is amazing how the outside world can affect our attitudes.

On a happier note, my younger sister is engaged! The date is January 13, 2007! Congrats to them and I'm proud to say that my soon to be brother in law is a great Christian man! We're lucky to have you in the family!

Just Thinking . . .

2006-08-31T14:04:00.000-07:00

Today begins my long day of classes. It is 4:00 and I have been here at UNT since 9:00 this morning. I will be here until 8:20 tonight. Good news today. Our investment house sold!!! Woo Hoo! Next investment? A house for us to really live in. More good news. The cancer has not spread. My grandpa has a better chance of surviving prostate cancer. Even better news! I am going on vacation to Hot Springs Arkansas and I am hoping to see the passion play there! (provided that it is not sold out)Read a good book called "Perfect Trust." Very short and to the point on trusting God to handle your life. It was really good tabernacle material (2:00 a.m. bath tub reading for a week straight)Everyone had a special place where they like to curl up with a good book. The environment must be just right inorder to sit, read, and reflect. My place just happens to be the bathtub between 12:00-2:00 a.m. Where are your special places where you like to sit, read, reflect and talk to God.

NEED PRAYERS!!!!

2006-08-26T00:16:00.000-07:00

This is the first time I have revealed this to anyone besides Nancy's answering machine today at church. Three days ago I found out that my grandpa (who just turned 80 in July)has prostate cancer. The doctor did a bone scan on Wednesday to see if it has spread. We get the results hopefully on Monday. This is a crucial test. If the test says it had spread, my grandpa will only have a few years (maybe) to live. If it hasn't spread he can get shots which will shrink the cancer and he could live over 15 years. The doctors have decided that he is to old to operate on, so the shots are his only hope. My family is very tight knit, so this is affecting everyone in their own way. My grandma cried a lot right now, she is still recovering from a knee replacement in April. What horrible timing for this to happen. My mom is trying to be strong as she is the one in our family that is in Texas that can come to their aid and watch over them. This puts loads of stress on my mom with work, and trying to move her mother down here. (Grandparents are divorced) Me, I think today it finally has sunk in. When I was talking to the answering machine it was the first time to really talk about the reality of the situation. Shaune knows, of course, he's been keeping up with this who ordeal, so we have never really had to talk about it. But today was my first time to really hear myself speak the words and face the reality that my grandfather may be dying. (*tear*) I guess I just always imagined that my grandparents would be here to see their great-grandchildren and watch them become toddlers before they passed on. Please pray for the recovery for Charles P. Lewis. I added him to the prayer chain today, and with radiation treatments and such I will be helping my family again and staying on my toes forever moving. Just when I though I would be getting a break too. Thanks for your prayer everyone.

New Job?

2006-08-18T09:39:00.000-07:00

Somehow I seemed to have developed a small business on the side of ESD. I don't really know how it happened. One wedding led to another wedding and before you know it, I am helping 3 people plan their weddings and have another possibly on the way (my sister). The last job that I undertook I am being paid for. I have really enjoyed getting to express my creative side in many different ways, (and I get to do a bunch of crafts and don't have to pay for them!) and help people get what they want for a steal of a price and a small fee for me. Shaune is helping me to develope a business contract for future clients that I might have. Could this really be a side business? I don't know, I guess we'll just have to find out.

Business is the Way of America (and me)

2006-08-15T21:41:00.000-07:00

August is Minichurch month in my church. Its also start up new bible study times. One thing that I do not like is all the women biblestudy times are during the middle of major college class hours. For the past 3 years I have only been able to participate in 5 short term women's bible studies. No Joy, no classes offered by CBC. This is sad, I wish they had a class time offered on Wednesday night or Sunday morning for Women. Shaune and I were flipping through the classes offered and we found a few offered for men on Sundays, but none for women. Kinda strange, kinda sad. Oh well you can't please all of the people all of the time.

Shaune and I have decided to try out a new class on Tuesday nights. Monday night we usually attend minichurch, but the last summer semester we have had to take off for school, and sadly, we will have to take off for school for the Fall as well. School makes everything so difficult. The class being taken: Love and Respect It ends around Thanksgiving and it on the only day that both of us have nothing going on. I'm looking forward to it and I think he is to. New people to meet and get to join his soccer team.

Wedding Planning may be in my future. I have my hand helping to decorate two weddings and had someone in ESD ask me to be her paid wedding planner. I think that is way cool. There might be another under my belt before to long. My sister graduated from SFA last weekend and her boyfriend of forever (Blake) just got a big promotion. They live almost 2 hours from one another. Wedding bells may be in their furure (I say spring or Summer). SO much to think about so little time. I haven't decided to accept the planning job yet, but we'll see. You know, I just now titled my blog so maybe by looking at it I will take a break from all extra curricular activities.

Been cleaning the house for a week now. Almost done. Few more days yet! Mom is excited to see the photo book from Germany. Will show her this weekend!

Girlfriends

2006-08-03T15:40:00.000-07:00

I am almost done with summer school. I must say I have never had this many papers due in one class before. Thank GOD when it is over. I love my life. It is like one big amusement park ride that I can ride over and over again. This summer I have made some new friends. When one gets married, one discoverer quickly that all your single friends ditch you quickly and you life becomes something new. Being married and not having children at our age does make it hard to get together with couples our own age. I love kids, don't get me wrong, but the good old days when you can go out and have a good girls night out are long gone. Thus, when you are young and married, without single friends, girls' nights out are a thing of the past. Well this summer, I made some good friends. Suprising, it is my morning staff at Summer's Cool. They are around my age and each different. One is trying to brake into being a P.E. Coach. She would make a dang skippy one at that. (Did I just say dang skippy?) Another is a teacher this year out in Frisco. She is such a gentle woman with a great creative streak. The third is a blond bombshell who looks like one of those girls in high school who you would never talk to because she was a popular mean girl. She is so the opposite. And did I mention that she went to A&M! On Thursday I had my first girls night out since my batcholrette party! We went bowling down in Denton and had lots of laughs. I an not that great at bowling, but WOW! I HAD AN AWESOME SCORE! I made a new friends the other day. Her name is Kelly and she just happens to be dating a friend of mine. She is beautiful and so much fun. I look forward to getting to know her more in the future. I realize now how important good girlfriends are and how they play an important part in peoples live. I am thankful for my minichurch group. I don't make it lot of the times, but, they have been my friends for a long time. They all have kids which are growing like weeds before my eyes. So many new babies are coming into my life in the next few months. Four to be exact. I'm taking my time though. I have a lot of this world to see (especially Germany) before I have babies of my own one day. Sorry dad, your stash of stuff that I found in the garage will have to Waite a few more years....

Here are pictures of some of my friends who know how to have a great time!
P.S. The picture of Germany are great Robyn. My mom is living vicariously through you!

Almost The End

2006-07-19T11:05:00.000-07:00

The summer is almost at an end. Next week is the last week of camp. I am so sad. I was spoiled with a team as great as mine. I will miss all of our kids too. I really look forward to the summer each year because we have such as great group of kids. Being a Site Supervisor was great experiece. It really opened my eyes to myself in terms of strengths and weaknesses. I am talking in blah sentences that really convey no feeling at all. Maybe this calls for a vacation after graduation.

To Whom It May Concern: Marilee has had her baby on Monday. Gracie Mae is her name and she is BESAUTIFUL!!!! So beautiful. *sigh* I can/ can't waite to have kids!

Back in Action

2006-07-11T15:16:00.000-07:00

VBS in now over. The day after setup, I ended up with a virus that was acting like a severe sinus infection. Oh joy!! I am still recovering from it. Now I am able to enjoy Sumer's Cool!I love my kids, they are so great! It is hard not to laugh when a pathalocial liar hands you a library book and tells you that the boy in the picture is his brother and his name is martin. The only problem with this is the book is on South Africa! I know his family and they are from around here. Its things like this that make the days so much fun.

Summer school is has started back up and I am taking a class that is EXACTLY like the class that I took last semester. Same book, same notes, same power point, same material, same UNT that is making me take it and won't let me comp out of the class. Oh Well! I am glad I am taking this class over the sumer and not in the fall. The class would be so boring then.

Shaune and I have started planning our vacation to Europe next year. I am so excited! I am hoping to fly over and stay with a friend who is close to our family. :) She knows who she is... Guess I better get the ball rolling and call her and see when would be a good time to come visit!

Open House for Summer's Cool is on Thursday. The slide show that I am preparing is way cool. I am nervous speaking infront of all those parents though! There will be over 60. Guess if I am going tp be a teacher I have to start sometime!

Life and God is soooo Gooood!

Pride

2006-06-19T20:05:00.000-07:00

Today is my push week for VBS. There is much to be done in final prep, mostly little things, but I have one week to get them done. I was downstairs in the basement hanging the coral paintings on the walls by myself, in the heat because there is not air conditioner in the church. Some woman whom I did not know paid me a complement on all of my work and was impressed with my talent. The downstairs is starting to look great and all I could think about was it was a shame that in a weeks time, all the decorations that I have spent HOURS making will be torn down and tossed in the trash. At the thought of this I got a little angry. All this work just to have it torn down. Then a little voice went off in my head. It said to me, "WHAT IN THE HECK ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT! This is not about you. It is about the children this is benefiting! Many children could be lead to Christ through VBS and I am blessed just to be apart of it!" I feel shameful now for my thoughts at that moment. This was never about me and for some moment I had turned it all around. I'm glad the voice spoke to me and reminded me of what is important. Pride stinks! I am glad to be back in my right mind. All the hours spent will be worth it to seek the kids faces light up next monday. Things like this is what childhood memories are made of!

A Man and his Boy

2006-06-13T19:18:00.000-07:00

Here is the newest member of the Corbett family . . . Jasper! He lives with my father-in-law and Dylan. Here we are two weeks after Jasper came home on a MS Walk in April.

Internet Owner

2006-06-13T19:14:00.000-07:00

Today the internet guy can and installed it in our apartment. We also got cable. I think I am really enjoying this! I can watch T.V. and type on the computer at the same time. I hope this does not affect my ability to get things done around the house. I know when I had cable before, I would watch it and not get a lot done. It is distracting.

My cat has found his first toy that appeases him. It is a bee that has crinkle plastic inside it. He loves it. More tomorrow! Hurray for the internet!

Finally I can blog!!!

2006-06-09T17:52:00.000-07:00

So I have been trying to get to my parent house to blog. I really miss it. Camp has been giving me the run around. I love it!! I have great kids, moody parents, and a GREAT STAFF!!!! It took me about two days before I was able to get into my groove and be a natural leader. When I am nervous I do not take charge of people like I know I can. Camp is going great.

Shaune and I finally broke down and will be getting internet on Tuesday night. He realized that as a teacher, I need the internet for various things, and conveniently, we found a note on our door that said Comcast (which I hate) would be in the area on a Saturday to offer special deals on Internet and cable. So we got a package deal on the internet and basic cable. I am excited and cannot wait to blog regularly again! Will post again on Tuesday night or Wednesday after the internet has been installed. I have so many cute thing to journal about my children and great staff!

A HOME NO MORE

2006-05-28T19:57:00.000-07:00

Shaune and I had the house inspected on Friday. It turns out that the house has foundation problems. To good to be true. We have made the decision to not buy the house. Reasons being I did not want to buy a lemon and end up being stuck living in a piece of fruit for the rest of my life like James and the Giant Peach. (He had a really cool story, but I would not like to live in a piece of fruit.) We decided to end our search because we are currently involved in a business investment for Shaune's company. Our ship has sailed for now, but may come again next year. Boo hoo to living in an apartment where the kids run around like a heard of buffalo and the man down stairs curses like a boat load of sailors. Yes to living in the apartment because of my really awesome creek where I can sit and stare at the beauty of God and marvel at his depth in creation. WOO HOO for the internet! We will finally be breaking down and spending the outrageous $40 bucks a month to have the internet in our apartment.

The summer program starts next week. I will be setting up my site and training people this week. Pray for my nervousness and the confidence to be a good Site Supervisor. I am so excited about this summer!

A Home

2006-05-24T17:31:00.000-07:00

Today the banks sent back our contracts SIGNED!! We have five days to get an inspector in there to look at it, which to my amazement, my husband has one lined up tomorrow at 1:00. PRAISE BE TO GOD! If all goes well we will take possession of our new home on June 16th and be out of our apartment by June 26th. Thanks to all for your prayers. Will post a picture of our almost-ours house later.

A Possible Home...?

2006-05-20T19:02:00.000-07:00

Shaune and I may have a house very soon. We have laid down two contracts on homes only to be beat out by two other contracts. On Thursday a foreclosed popped up on the MLS. By that night were looking at it. It needs a lot of paint, new carpet, pull everything out of the front and back yard, a new stove, fridge, and a little love. It is however in a GREAT neighborhood, and is 2,000 square feet. It is also 30,000 dollars below what it should be selling for in the neighborhood. It has 4 bedrooms, a large master, dining, and living room. The kitchen is big, but you could only fit a very small table set in it. It has a great backyard for kids, and a hot tub. We looked at it the first day on the MLS and had on unofficial inspector come out and look at it. By day 2 on the market Shaune laid down a contract... and they came back with a counter offer. We know the house was shown over the weekend because we went by to look at it again and the front door was wide open, all the doors unlocked. Shaune and I always lock all the doors to the house. We sent another counter offer and earnest money today, and hopefully it will be the first contract to be looked at on the Bank's table on Monday. If it is and the bank accepts our counter offer, we move to a pending status. This would be an excellent first home that we could live in for a LONG time. Please pray for us and pray that our contract is the first looked at if anyone else has laid down a contract this weekend. As of Saturday, we are still the first people to lay down a contract. I really like this home and I hope we get it! Our window is closing quick on how much time we have to buy a home (due to other business opportunities) other wise we will stay in our apartment for a year. We should know something by Monday!

End of the School Year

2006-05-18T17:37:00.000-07:00

I have been busy! We are still looking for a home and school is coming to an end and the summer program is just starting! Exciting!

Job Description

2006-05-11T07:57:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking to myself lately as I observe the world around me and I have begun to wonder, "What do I want to be?" I have decided to be a teacher. Mostly everybody know that I want to be a teacher. A teacher of art, a general classroom teacher, any of these would float my boat. But I will say that working with ESD has opened my eyes about something. I have changed what I want to be. In stead of just being a teacher, I want to be the teacher that can help effective transition learning disabled children, and high function disabled children back into the classroom. Through the various schools I have been at I have discovered that not enough needs are being met. General classroom teachers have been relying on the resource teacher or the inclusion teacher to handle the children. Many teachers are overwhelmed by people with disabilities. I am at times too. But I think that because of being Dyslexic and see how people treated me, I want to help the children and set the parents down the right road when they are young. I believe the more you invest in your children, the more you will enjoy them and teach them how to be a good stewart with what you have. Jesus said "Let the little children come to me." And they came. I say bring on the challenge and let God show me the path I am to take, and if this be the road, then so be it.

Math Class

2006-05-08T08:17:00.000-07:00

*Trumpets Heralding in the Background*

Hear Ye, Hear Ye! I HAVE PASSED MATH WITH AN "A"! My graduation in a year and a half is now secure! This Dyslexic has made her first and last A in math because I do not have to take math anymore! WOO HOO!

House Hunting

2006-05-07T17:14:00.000-07:00

Our apartment complex decided that they were going to raise our rent by 10 percent. Shaune and I have decided to find a house. We found a really cute one and there are no offers on it yet. On Monday or Tuesday there will be an offer though. OURS!!! My husband is truly amazing. He was able to make as few call and show me houses with his realestate license. We looked at 5 in one day decided on two that we like. Hopefully they will not raise above our price range. My husband has great talent on reading people, he has better woman's intuition than I have! House hunting is stressful though. It is a real marriage tester. You have to be patient and play the waiting game. Make concession with one another about what you want, where you want to live and what you can afford. My husband is wise with money and is choosing houses that we can afford and live comfortably. He is a good husband. I am lucky to have him. I learned a valuable lesson this week. Trust in the talents that God has gifted you with. Use them to your abilities and trust others to use them wisely.

Loss of the Internet

2006-05-01T18:33:00.000-07:00

I don't think I appreciated the internet until I lost it. The people we were bootlegging the internet from decided move out. Now we do not get the internet in our apartment anymore. My husband and I have things we need to get paid off before we can afford to get it. We don't have cable either. We have a 42 inch screen t.v., but no cable! I think this is funny. I am going to have to visit my mom and dad more, either that or save up a year and decide to buy it. Let me see, news, news,.... my grandmother went home the other day. She is healthy and well. My cat has allergies, I am up to my ears in homework, reports, and finals that are coming up next week. Of course it is all stuff that I need the internet for. Our country and life style has become so dependent on the internet. If terrorists really wanted to displace people, get rid of the internet and the phone lines. That would slow America down. It is such as shame that we have become so dependent on it. Everything that I wanted to watch on t.v. I can watch on the internet. Don't need the home shopping net work, I have e-bay! No one uses the phone as much as they do e-mail. What do you think?

Grandmother Update

2006-04-19T20:26:00.000-07:00

I have spent the last several days rising early and coming home late in order to see my family. My grandmother Carol, her sugary went along great, but her recovery time took her twice as long as was predicted for her to come out of. She was hurting really badly and the hospital almost OD on pain killers, so my mom spent the 1st night at the hospital with her because the gave her a reversal and put her on oxygen. At times she would stop breathing for a second or two so thus the oxygen. They sedated her pretty heavily. The only time they could get her to wake up and come around was when they would say "Grandma" really loud and she would look for her grandchildren. I however, am the only grandchild in the area. I got there on Tuesday night and my mom and grandpa had just left. My grandfather was having sever anxiety problems with seeing my grandma in such a sedated state.

It was awesome. When I got to her room, it was the first time she had come around all day, she talked to me and carry on small conversations. She laughed lightly, and was happy. Shaune and I stayed for about 45 minutes before leaving. On the way home I called my grandpa and told him we had been there to see her. I did not realize how badly my grandma had been until I called my grandpa. He started crying when I told her how grandma had responded. He was happy. Today, I got up early in the morning to go and visit her. Mom told me that I may not want to come because she was just as bad as the night before the first visit. My grandpa was really sad again because he had never seen her in a good condition yet. After I arrived, it was just like when I had visited before. She started coming around and talking and laughing. She was much better. My grandpa started crying again because now he could see that she would really be getting better. As of tonight, she is more coherent and out of danger with the medication situation. She is still in a lot of pain, but God has been with her.

Thanks everyone for your prayers! I have been in prayer for several days now and I have no idea how prayer warriors pray as much as they do! It sucks the life out of you! I am exhausted after so much time in prayer. But, it does leave me at peace with myself and whatever happens. Kudos to those who are constantly praying. I love to pray, don't get me wrong, I do it a lot. Some of my prayers are short and I try not to ask for to much for myself, but there are just some of those people who are ment to pray. They spend long days secluded from people and just pray. I am definitely not one of those people. Thanks to those that do.

Grandmother

2006-04-16T08:20:00.000-07:00

My grandmother goes in for a full knee replacement on Tuesday morning. Please pray that everything goes well as she is getting up there in years, and my grandfather is so dependent upon her. My mom will be staying with my grandfather to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid incase something goes wrong during the procedure. Happy easter to all!

HE IS RISEN!

Obsessive Movie Watchers

2006-04-11T22:12:00.000-07:00

So you know you have watched a movie too many times when you start noticing all the little words and things that should not be in the movie. I have watched the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe more than 10 times all ready. The fox is not in the book, and neither is the kids eating breakfast in Narnia, The book says that Edmond was refreshed by wine. On the 4th time, I found something sad. In the battle scene where Mr. Tumnus is running down the slopes and the giant is swinging his club, there it is. The mother of all dirty works ringing clear in all of its nasty glory. First I thought I was hearing things. And then after about 10 replays, I new the sad truth. I had become like the people who discovered the dirty action scenes in "The Little Mermaid, The Lion King, and Aladdin." Such a sad day in Narnia.

Anniversary

2006-04-05T18:54:00.000-07:00

Shaune and I had a great 1st anniversary. We started off the morning by going to Donut City in Coppell and then to Starbucks for some major studying time that both of us needed. My sister called and we had a great talk. At 1:00 we had a massage appointment. We did a couples massage where they work on both of you in the same room. This was funny because Shaune had told me that he had a massage before. I get them about once every 3-6 months so I though everything would go great. Shaune's face was priceless when the therapist told him to take off his cloths and then get underneath the sheet. The ladies left, he looked up and I was already half naked. I couldn't help but laugh. I said, "I thought you have had a massage before?" He said, "Yeah, a chair massage at the mall." He really enjoyed the massage. It is something that both of us will do maybe once a year together. He had a study group session at 3:00 and then I took a nap. Later on that night we went to Maggianos in Plano. We ended up with enough food to feed the both of us for a week! Lots of food, prices are not bad at all. For 24.50 per person you get all you can eat. And man, do they keep it coming! Today we are ending our celebration with NARNIA! It was my final gift from him and I CAN'T WAITE TO WATCH IT! I love the chronicles, Hmm... maybe that will be my next blog entry...

Innocents

2006-04-01T19:46:00.000-08:00

Today Shaune and I did the MS walk down in Addison. Wee took my dog Emma with us and invited my father in law and Shaune's younger brother Dylan, and their Pug dog Jasper. We walked with Team Waldman who is a huge sponsor and does the benefits for Ameristar. Wile we were walking there was the cutest little black boy, probably the age of 4 walking with his mom, grandma, and sister. When he saw Jasper or Emma he would yell " DOGGIE! DOGGIE DOGGIE!" really loud, clap his hand and jump up and down at the same time. He had the most gorgeous smile and beautiful pearly whites. For about half a mile he ran after Emma smiling laughing, and trying to grab her tail. Every now and then he would laugh and yell, "DOGGIE GET BACK HERE!" and when she would look back at him, he would laugh and chase her some more. She did not mind him the whole time. After a while he started walking with his hand on her back and then soon wanted to help me walk her. His mom was wonderful to talk to and we shared smiles and laughs as her son just had the best of time. We soon started to fall behind our team so we had to part ways and I could catch up. He was really sad and did not want Emma and I to go.

Children are really something, you know? Children bring the brightest light into your life on such a rainy morning. They no nothing of the world in which they live in. God is so amazing in everything He creates. Children have such an innocents in them that as we grow, we will never be able to obtain until Jesus returns. I may never see that little boy again, but just thinking about him makes me smile.

Almost anniversary

2006-03-29T08:38:00.000-08:00

Isn't it amazing how fast life can fly by? This Sunday Shaune and I will have been married for a year. A YEAR!!! Where has all the time gone? Somedays, it feels like we have been married forever, and others only a short time. Bill Lee asked me the other day at church the $64,000 question? Is it everything you though that it would be? My answer:

Yes it is. I knew there would be good times and bad times. But I always say that I look forward to the bad times because that is when you grow the most, as an individual and a couple. It is never fun when you are in the middle of a situation, but to look back on it and see where God has been in you life is incredible. I love my husband and would marry him all over again.

(We are celebrating our anniversary by getting massages together. WOO HOO!)

Soccer

2006-03-25T17:20:00.000-08:00

I played my first soccer game today for the first time since 7th grade. That was over 11 years ago. Shaune decided a while ago to put a soccer team together at work. Husbands and wives could join too, so I now play coed soccer for a team called "No Gray Area" (We are poking a little fun at his boss because he says this a lot) We won 7-6 and I played defense. It was a very cool experience to play a sport just for fun. Both teams want to win, but it is not as competitive as the men's league. (They destroy one another and get kicked out of games) I had TONS of fun and it was great to meet other girls. I feel more motivated to go out and do more now. Its amazing what a little bit of exercise can do for you. Soccer is also special to me because my husband and I are on the same team. He is a great motivator and encourager. All the ladies told me that he brags about me at work which was so flattering to hear. It make me happy to hear so many people tell me what a great man my husband is. I am thankful that he loves God the ways he does and because he loves God, he loves me in a way that I have never been loved before. *Sigh* Just another wonderful day. I Love life, even when it throws you curves. Its the twists and turns in life that let you grow in ways you never through you could.

Term Papers

2006-03-24T21:53:00.000-08:00

Why is it that teachers place term papers and test the week after spring break? They know that no one works on anything over spring break and people forget how to work problems in science and math. I think they do it to break us of our fun. This week has been filled with papers. Four to be exact and 1 vocabulary test, and 2 exams. What a week. I have realized how far children can grow in a year. A man I knew growing up named Adam Hagg was in one of the LISD papers with Grayson and he now teaches at Briarhill middle school. Funny, both of us went there and we were in the same grade and I am still stuck in school. He has become a great teacher. Someday I hope to be the same.

Divorce: Relationship Party Crasher

2006-03-17T12:10:00.000-08:00

So I got back from Nebraska on Wednesday. Shaune was meeting my grandmother Mary (my mom's mom) and her brother Jay for the 1st time. We had a blast. I don't get to see her very often, so I treasure the times that I do. We went to the air museum and the zoo. In 4 days I went from wearing a t-shirt, to long sleves. 1st day: nice weather. 2nd day: light hail, slight rain, cold weather, 110 tornadoes hitting counties around us. 3rd day: snow in the morning sticking to the ground. (We all went to the zoo this day. Do we know how to have fun or what!) 4th day: t-shirt weather again.

In these 4 days, my grandmother spent 1/4th the time remembering a divorce that happened over 30 years ago. I love my Grandmother, but isn't it about time that she let go? My grandfather left her after 22 years of marriage for one of her best friends. (They remain married 30 years to the day, my grandparents Phil and Carol, they are GREAT together) She admits that she is still bitter about the whole thing. Does that not suck? But life goes on and so do people. She remarried and lost her husband of some years the same week as my wedding. I think I only had 3-4 conversations where she mentioned Bob (the man she remarried). If anger and bitterness is a poison, why do we hang on? I wonder if the anger and pain ever truly goes away when we have been jilted. She told me that she felt like she never knew Phil the whole 22 years they were married and the same thing with Bob because he portrayed himself as a great god seeking man and changed right after they got married. In my mind I think, how can you be married to someone for 22 years and not know them? But, then I remember my own horrid relationship that I was in for 3 years and the guy turned out to be a lying, double life leading creep, that I thought I knew.

It scares me to think you can be married to some for so long and change. It is sad what divorce can do to a family. I pray that nothing like that happens to Shaune and I. I know that I am capable of divorce even though I think to myself "I'm not like that. I won't be like that," but it is scary because you never know where the two of you will be in 20 or 30 years. I only hope that I can safeguard myself and have the privilege to falling in love with my husband multiple times. It scares me even more to think that someone can hold on to bitterness for over 30 years and let it control every move in your life. Do you even live if your life is controlled by that? If marriage is one of the last covenants, why do so many people break it? It is special and yet it gets treated like trash. Just more signs I guess that this world is getting closer to it's end...

My vacation was great. My husband and I talked about plans for a house, children, and life in the next couple years and we enjoyed spending time that we do not normally get with one another. I Love snuggling with my husband! *sigh* My Grandma Mary and her brother Jay LOVED Shaune! We spent a couple of day going through Wedding photos and videos, since she was not at my wedding. I hope she moves down here and spends the later part of her life seeing her future great-grandchildren. She and I have tons of fun together.

P.S. You know your vacation was worth it when someone from the north asks you "What is an Enchilada?"

Ick! Vacation!

2006-03-08T20:11:00.000-08:00

Today and yesterday have been whirl winds. So much has happened. Shaune came home Tuesday night and proceeded to tell me during the middle of one of my migraines that we could not go on a vacation that we had already planned a month and a half ago. His company is moving (and doing some other things that I cannot say until next week) and he has to be there as the Director of Human Resource. The president of the company told him him he could not go, even after ok-ing his vacation. So, he came home and told me the only way we would be able to visit my grandmother, whom I have not seen in 3 years, would be to leave two days from then, this Friday, and come home on Wednesday.

So I had to . . .

move a final,
beg my boss to get work off,
cancel my substituting for Sunday school,
clean the house,
pack,
finish all my home work early,
study,
go to a meeting for Summer's Cool,
help a friend finish her bulletin board at school,
do 4 loads of laundry,
switch bible study on Friday nights,
find someone to watch my cat,
boil peanuts,
cancel getting an oil change in my car,
and go shopping for stuff for the trip.

I had to do all of this in two day! (And I took time to write in my blog) I will admit that I was very unhappy with my husband for doing all of this at the last minute, as he knew a lot of this would probably happen before hand. I had some anxiety issues, but he handled them great, and I will say, for someone with a migraine headache and stressed to the max about finals this week, I think I handled it quite well. Shaune has been very helpful around the house trying to do what he can to help me get ready. This was one of those learning experiences when you find out what kind of stress your marriage can handle.

God grant me sanity through all this!

2nd Floor: The 2nd Dimension

2006-03-04T21:29:00.001-08:00

As long as I live when I move out of an apartment, I will never move back into one on the second floor. Shaune and I live on the 2nd floor of a 3 story building. There are a couple of reasons why it is great.

Reason #1. We bootleg free wireless uncoded internet from the people next door to us.
Reason #2. When we got married we only had to move my things, not two peoples things from two different place.
Reason #3. We have a beautiful view of the creek from our balcony behind our house
Reason #4. Did I mention we are getting free internet?

I have lived in this apartment now for almost two years and have found myself living in the second dimension. It is the second dimension because people on the 1st and 3rd floor only have to listen to one thing. Here in the 2nd floor you have to listen to two things. This is almost like the skit "Whose on First?" The 1st floor person has to put up with noise from the people on the 2nd floor. The 3rd floor people have to put up with the noise coming from below them. The people on the 2nd floor have to deal with noise from the 1st and 3rd floor. The man downstairs curses and yells at his T.V all the time. "God d*m* it" and "**ck" leaves his mouth when he is watching sports, his dog makes him mad, or he is yelling at people on the phone. His dog barks and cries all the time. The lady above us has boys in middle school who run around and fight continuously. They yell, slam doors, and sound like a heard of buffalo running through the house. It is great when you get both of these at 10:00 o'clock at night. I would never suggest 2nd floor living to anybody. All I can say is thank God for free internet to make living her worth my wild!

College Burnout

2006-03-03T08:09:00.000-08:00

Math has always been a rough spot for me. But this semester I might have a chance to pass it! My teacher is just about as weird and out there as I am so I understand his style of teaching. So far I have turned in all the home work and my lowest grade on them is an 8/10. Test week is coming up the week after spring break and I am a bit nervous about taking his test. If I pass this class, it will be the last math class I will ever have to take!

I had the unfortunate bad luck to discover that I have at least 2 and 1/2 years left in school because of my math problems. Sometimes I just want to quit and move on with my life. Does school really matter all that much? It has always been important to my parents and as equally important to finish school before having children. I feel if I have children in the near future that I will let them down. Granted Shaune and I are not ready to have children yet, but you never know what God will through your way. I know I will finish my degree and this is my life, and I make the choices in it, but I think I tend to let people control my emotions too much. I am burned out from school. I think that I am a great teacher, but because of a math disability and weed out courses, I am afraid I may not be able to live one my dreams. Another dream is to write curriculum books or vacation bible school packages. This would be great! I love creating and coming up with new ideas. In this world now a day, having a degree has become more important than experience. This creates a disadvantage for older people without degrees and have experiences, and people who do not have the income or the extra money to go get a four year degree. Since when did living the American dream include living more than one job and a college education? Has our world just gotten too busy?

Mad Driver's and Cursing

2006-03-02T12:05:00.000-08:00

Blogging is something new to me. I am trying to get into the habit of writing on my blog because it is much quicker than writing in my journal. But, it takes longer to get onto the computer than it does to open a book.

Have you ever noticed how people are always in a hurry? So many people now a days are driving like mad men and women down the road and get upset when you following the rules of the road. On the way to work, I was driving 5 miles over the speed limit and I had someone driving on my bumper. She road there for a while and then decided to pass me by, but not before giving me "the bird". Why do people feel compelled to do this? The road belongs to everyone. People take things so personal when they drive. When she was riding my bumper I was angry that an old lady would drive that close to me and risk getting in a car accident. My first though was to brake check her, but I though better of it because of 2 reasons. 1st, it would not be nice. 2nd, it might cause her to hit me and ruin my car and I would be at fault with myself because I could have avoided an accident. I was upset that she flicked me off.

Later on in ESD I was playing a 4th grade boy in a game of connect four. We were both getting competitive and he ended up beating me. I said "Good Cow!" I received an interesting response to that remark. I was excited when I said good cow, it's always been a way of showing that I am upset or excited about something. The boy said, " So that is the work you use instead of cursing!" This caught me off guard. I told him no, that I use various weird words when I am excited or up set. But later on I realized just how smart he was. For most people, when they get upset the tend to curse. Those who try to be a little more polite use other words or gestures to spare other or young children from the offensive language. But words really do not matter do they? It is all in the context of how the word is being used. Both words have a negative meaning to them and are used to show displeasure in something or at someone. Children are amazingly smart to be picking things like this up in elementary school.

Lord, help people learn how to control anger when it is uncalled for. Teach us how to have a healthy expression of anger and to be mindful of pride. By thinking that someone is doing something against us, when it is unintentional, it is taking a situation and turning it into all about us. By doing this, we are helping to create barriers for keeping others out. We show other a horrible side of us that may help turn people from getting to know God. Remind us to be mindful of others.

My cat Manderin

2006-03-01T22:49:00.000-08:00

Weird Weekend

2006-02-18T12:45:00.000-08:00

I was studying in Startbucks this morning when a little girl walked up and started talking to me. She was cute, long curly, brown hair, brown eyes, big smile.... after talking about my chapstick on the table, my colored pens, trying my colored pens, and telling me that her name was Batman, she made her way over to another man and started talking to him. I looked for the mother and she was ordering a drink, not paying any attention to her child, or who her child was talking to. How scary it would be to have a child who was friendly to everyone? It would make it so easy to kidnap her or use her in a scam. After a few minutes and a few more people, "Batman" made her way back to me. It was about 7-8 minutes before her mother came looking for her. She has to have been 4-6 years of age. She carried a mini magna-doodle with her and never drew on it. I wonder who my children will be like when I have them? I wonder what kind of mother will I be?

God~ make me strong enough to remember that there are other more important besides me in this world. Let me be a faithful guardian of my children and keep a visual over them for you.